Existentialism
by Ignite the Airwaves
Summary: “I’ll only ask this one more time,” Raven’s eyes glowed black, “Who is this! Why are you here!” That dark chuckle once again. "Oh my dear Raven, I'm disappointed you even have to ask." First fic. Robrae Rated M for later chapters.
1. Alone

**AN- well, this is my first fic. Yay? Tell me what you guys think. This is starting out pretty neutral, but there most likely will be a RobRae pairing at least halfway through. Please don't flame if you don't like the pairing. Go use your time on something more productive, like eating cookies!**

Existentialism

Chapter 1: Alone

Raven sat with her face squinted in frustration. The tell-tale alarm had just rung with an alert of a petty villain, and the team had left her behind, though not without many a protest. But there was just no arguing with Robin. She was the best at it, and still she lost quite often.

The tower was much too quiet for her tastes. Sure, Raven enjoyed the sounds of silence, but after years of being on this team, she had to admit that sometimes she would miss the noises of screaming and explosions in the corridors. _Well, you only miss it when it's not there_, she reasoned.

Bored. Raven was actually bored. She had read her books millions of times, and though they never seemed to get old, she was immensely opposed to reading at the moment, which was quite unlike her. Yet she could find nothing else to do.

_Damn that man_…

Raven had not imagined that a simple robber could best her, and she was right on that count. But gang members could be very sneaky indeed, mostly the one that had snuck up from behind with a lead pipe. The asshole had beaten her up, choked her, and thrown her off the top of a forty-three story building. She just thanked Azar that Robin had caught her before she had hit the ground (though they had only been inches away from the concrete). However, the fall had done her quite a bit of damage.

And now Robin had insisted that she stay home and rest.

It was the weakness that destroyed her. The very feeling of not being useful, the degradation of being left home due to injuries that she felt had no effect on her fighting. Raven clenched her fists from within her darkened room, trying so hard to concentrate on the solidity of her three word mantra.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos…,"

Suffice to say, it was not working very well. Her purple curtains blew in a sudden burst of air. Then the slightest creak made Raven's eyes shoot open, wary and suddenly aware of how alone she was at that very moment. She shook the feelings aside. She was Raven of the Teen Titans. She didn't do fear. She refused to.

Raven's hands lit with dark, crackling energy as she stood from her bed, eyes sweeping her room for anything out of the ordinary. There! A dark shadow skipped across her walls. Raven hardened her expression, wishing briefly that her hood was up to hide her face. There was a quick thought in her mind that this was only a petty villain like Control Freak, but she discarded the notion when she quickly noted that if that had been the case, he would already have shown himself and bragged at the look on her face. No, this person was smarter. Faster. Darker. Her eyes flew to the white chest under her bed. Locked. _Okay, that's one problem that doesn't have to be dealt with._

_I should call for help_, she thought, eyeing the yellow communicator lying like a beacon of light on her old wooden chest of drawers. _No, they're on a mission. I can deal with this myself. I can take care of myself._ This thought made Raven feel more defiant.

"Who's there?" she demanded, "Show yourself!"

There was a deep, amused chuckle, and Raven found herself continually whirling to find the source as it moved about her small living space. All shadows seemed to jump and rise with the dim lighting in her room, and soon Raven found it hard to know where to look. Her ankle throbbed with the pain of being leaned on, but she pushed the prickling sensation aside. This was important. She needed to concentrate. Her amethyst eyes tried desperately to hone in on the intruder, and her fear was slowly mounting. No, she would not ignore the fear. Uncertainty had its chokehold on her. The unseen enemy is always much more imposing than the obvious one.

"I'll only ask this one more time," Raven's eyes glowed black, "Who is this?! Why are you here?!"

That dark chuckle once again. But now Raven's mind connected to memories and she recognized the voice that had created it. Her neck prickled with fear that only this man could bring her.

"Oh, my dear Raven. I'm disappointed that you even have to ask."

A shift. Orange. Rustle of fabric against legs. Tight arms suffocating a thin waist. A mind numbing, astronomically painful prick. Limp lavender locks. And then the darkness.

**AN- There's chapter one. A bit shorter than I'd like, but my first chapters always come out a bit short. Please R&R! I'll give you a cookie…that's productive! Bonus points for anyone who guesses who the intruder is (it probably isn't all that hard anyway).**

**~Ignite the Airwaves**


	2. Inevitable

**AN- Chapter number two! *fanfare* Ah, three reviewers already, and like five followers. Love you guys! **

**The bonus points go to:**

Regina Lunaris** for guessing SLADE!**

Manaria**- thanks, and yeah, I imagined that Control Freak would have done something like that.**

LaughingStock1**- Good try! However, I like to stay away from stories about long-lost family members.**

Regina Lunaris**- Thanks again, and good guess! **

Existentialism

Chapter 2: Inevitable

The first thing she noticed was the cold cutting of metal into soft, pale flesh. She knew that she was suspended above the ground against a wall, as both her ankles and wrists were shackled to a solid surface. A stale breeze wafted around her face, and Raven involuntarily shuddered. Her pale lips breathed out a misty fog in the nondescript area.

From the dead silence erupted a loud _SLAP_ that shot fiery pain across her face. Blood collected at the corner of her mouth, and she spat it out onto the ground, almost defiantly.

The feared chuckle came once more, and her body tensed as he felt his breath on her face. "Raven, I never expected to see you so vulnerable." The orange mask and single eye came into light.

"Slade," she hissed venomously.

"Temper, temper," he warned with a smirk, tapping her forehead once with each word. It was true that he enjoyed this position of high power, and he would not let Raven's spirit block her fear. He would break her, he was sure of that.

"What do you want with me?" her voice was still a low dangerous growl.

Slade laughed now. "That, my dear child, is for me to know and you to find out."

_That arrogant, cocky asshole…_

"AZARATH METRION ZIN-," Raven was interrupted by a mind numbing shock, and screamed shrilly despite her earlier plan to not let Slade see any weakness. Her body felt heavier now, she almost felt grounded in the knowledge that he was prepared for anything she would do.

"Like that, do you?" he was so amused, so arrogant. She wanted to wipe that smirk off of his face, although she was still panting from the white-hot heat of the shock. "Doctor Chang rigged this little device up for me," now his hands were clasped behind his back, "It shocks you with five times the energy of the strength from any spell you attempt to use."

Raven refused to answer.

"Answer me, bitch!" Slade roared, and slapped her once again across the face. Raven saw red, and her cheeks stung. She angrily held back the tears that were threatening to form, and spit the blood that had gathered in her mouth now at Slade's mask.

Bullseye.

And even with his mask on, Raven could see the evil, crazed look on Slade's face. At that moment she knew that she had pushed her luck too far, but it was already too late.

"Silly titans," he seemed to be attempting to keep his tone even. The blood had slid down his mask from right under his eye to the end of his cheek. Raven offhandedly noticed that it looked as if Slade was crying blood. "You always think that you can win the battle, even when it's already over."

There was a shimmer of silver that appeared in the dark, and Raven felt her stomach drop. He grinned, seeing that he had finally, even if only for a brief period, broken through the defenses of the Ice Queen. "I'm very sorry Raven. I didn't want to have to do this."

That was funny. He didn't sound sorry at all.

The first cut was deep, and Slade pulled the blade agonizingly slow across her inner thigh. Raven's inward struggle to withhold any screams, to keep from giving Slade pleasure, was harder than she could have ever fathomed. He seemed angry that all he had managed to earn for his violence was a small whimper. Slade grabbed a tight hold of Raven's neck, and black figures swam in her vision. He then plunged the silver knife deep into her chest, drawing a diagonal slash from her collarbone to the end of her stomach.

She felt red, she saw black. There were flashes in her eyes, and the pain was so white, so stinging. It raced up her body, prickling and fresh and wet. And this time, she was too distracted to even stop a shrill scream from escaping her chapped lips.

"AHHHHHHHHHHUGH." This ugly scream satisfied Slade even more than the first one would have; as his hand was still tight around Raven's throat, the scream came out hoarse and scratchy with pain. Pain that he caused. Slade smirked. He let go of Raven's neck and watched triumphantly as her head hung, she without any strength to hold it up.

Slade grabbed a tight hold on Raven's chin, his sharp fingernails leaving marks in her once flawless skin, forcing her to look him in the eye. "If you think that's bad, little, bird, wait until you see what I have planned for tomorrow. You better never question me again." He let go, and once again her head flopped. "Until tomorrow." The last thing she heard was his retreating footsteps. The pain. It tightened her chest. Raven found it hard to breathe. In a final act of defiance, she threw up her head and mentally screamed, _ROBIN_. An instant later, the darkness welcomed her like a friend.

Fifteen miles away, a spiky-haired teen ran to his friend's room, just having returned from a mission, and busted down the door. "Raven….," he whispered. His friend was not there.

**AN- Good? Bad? R&R! Oh, bad news. I'm going to be at sleepaway for three weeks starting Sunday. I may not be able to get another chapter in until camp is all over, though I'll try for another chapter this week. If you guys miss me, you can read a little oneshot I'm going to post soon. **

**~Ignite the Airwaves**


	3. Fear

**AN- Camp is done! **

RobRae4-** Thanks!**

Regina Lunaris- **Thanks, and I will!**

01LoVsTaR10- **Thanks!**

Spicy Sweet- **Thanks a lot.**

Tortor-**Can't tell you that, now can I? **

Turquoise Blue 14-**That's a good question. **

**On with the fic! This fic is rated M and I emphasize that in this chapter!**

Existentialism

Chapter 3: Fear

"Man, don't worry. This is Raven we're talking about. She probably just went on a walk."

A hassled Boy Wonder pulled his seemingly heavy head out of his hands and yelled, "FOR FIVE HOURS, CYBORG?!" The cybernetic teen raised his arms in defense and slowly retreated. Robin remained with eyes glued to the computer screen, fingers feverishly flying over the keyboard.

"Just-," Cyborg cut himself off. No need to stir another argument that Robin would stubbornly butt against. The kid was a damn ox. Maybe a mule was more accurate sometimes. Cyborg walked out of the room, chuckling despite himself and the desperate situation.

Robin felt like banging his head into the metal desk. Where could she have gone? Who could have taken her? He came across the video footage from her bedroom's security camera. An orange mask, a dark whisper. His masked eyes narrowed in anger, and he punched the desk in frustration, spitting out the accursed name that plagued him so. "Slade."

FearFearFearFear

It was still cold, this she knew. But she was no longer on the wall. There was something underneath her, white and stiff and hard. Like her back, currently. Those cuffs were still tight around her scrawny wrists, but they also seemed to be around posts of some sort. A chill rushed over her again, and Raven discovered that the large gash Slade had etched across her had slit open most of her leotard as well. The gash still shortened her breaths whenever the pain decided to double or even triple. She knew she shouldn't have been alone in the Tower, she should have been able to stop him, she should have….

Loud footsteps echoed into the room, approaching leisurely. It was quite obvious whom the footsteps belong to, and she tensed, her legs flailing hopelessly at a sad attempt towards some sort of convoluted escape.

"Raven, you must see that I have decided to allow you a bit more comfort."

She bit back a nasty retort. At the moment, Raven could not afford any more pain. He seemed to see her restraint, and, smirking, brushed a lock of hair away from her face. She growled.

"Now, now. Be nice. I'm about to do you a big favor."

Again she saw the silver and shut her eyes. _No, not again, please!_ He chuckled at her reaction. "Don't worry my dear, I am only doing what is necessary." She felt the smooth blade glide across her chest, her neck, her collarbones, her stomach- but felt no pain. And then her heart sank and she cowered- yes, actually cowered- as she came to understand what plans this evil man had in store for her. Raven had so many times wished that terrible things would happen to her, but never anything like this. She wouldn't wish it upon her worst enemy.

He grinned devilishly, feasting on the fear in her eyes. "Don't worry, Raven. It'll be all over soon." Her leotard slowly fell away with all the strategic cuts Slade had crafted, leaving the beautiful young woman in only black panties and a lacy black bra.

"Lace?" he murmured, amused, "Raven, I never would have guessed." Out came the knife again, slicing away at the little coverings she had left. She attempted to shield her body from the madman's view, but her hands were restrained as were her powers.

He slowly dragged a lazy hand up her thigh, resting much too high for comfort. Slade slowly brought himself on top of Raven, eyes relishing the sight beneath him. His hands ran along one of her delicate curves and she wrenched her eyes shut, shivering and looking more delicate than anyone had ever seen her. At this moment she was not a Titan. She was a woman who was desperately in trouble, in a place that no woman ever wished to be.

And suddenly his lips crashed against hers, forceful and demanding, bruising her in their own hungry lust. She felt like a traitor as her body arched into his, her body responding to the pleasure the way that it should as his fingers slid into her. She gasped, and her body felt hollow for a second until the fingers emerged, and he pulled his shirt over his head, scattering butterfly kisses and violent touches over her entire body. And then he tugged at his pants, and Raven felt numb. She knew what was going to happen. And she couldn't stop it, as he laid himself on top of her, prepared to do a rapist's work.

**AN- What will happen? DUN DUN DUN. Thanks to my readers, and please R&R!!!**


	4. Close

**AN- So many reviews again! School starts on Tuesday for me, so I can make no promises about the speed of my updates. **

Marro-**Yeah, I get what you mean. ;) **

kelle-**Thanks.**

RobRae4Ever!-**You bet, and I sure will!**

Regina Lunaris- **Such an avid reviewer, thanks! **

Turquoise Blue 14- **Thanks! And I just think it's interesting to step back and see Raven as a little more defenseless than usual, and how that would affect her as a person.**

Tortor- **Thanks, and I will!**

Tsuki-hime Neko- **Thanks so much!**

**Thank you all for being great reviewers. This chapter was delayed by fanfiction . net's refusal to upload it. ****On with the fic!**

Existentialism

Chapter 4: Close

The sweat on her forehead made her feel so wet, so very, very wet. Raven attempted to concentrate on her mantra, on anything besides the man above her who was slowly pulling away at the last shreds of her dignity and cool façade. Her breathing was heavy, and she kept herself from any arousal. She would not give him the pleasure, though she squirmed in his grasp. Her muscles felt tight, constricted, as though she might explode at any moment. And then there was the fear, lurking in her mind, unwilling to disappear.

Slade lowered his face to hers, about to pull off his mask. In the distance, on a small monitor of his, a warning alarm beeped.

--

The wind whipped by Robin, accompanied by many honking cars that ceased when the drivers realized who the man on the red motorcycle was. _Faster…come on, can't this thing go any faster…? _He revved the motorcycle, agitated as he sped along the streets. The others had not believed that Raven was in danger…sometimes she took long walks. But Robin knew that on those walks, she always answered her communicator. And there was also the video footage of her room. The other titans had insisted he imagined the masked face, as the room was very dark and the video filled with static and false images; he knew that he did not. _If they don't believe me, I'll just save her myself. _

The warehouse slowly grew in front of him as he approached it. Jumping off his motorcycle, Robin decided that a sneak attack was pointless, and perhaps this one time a normal entrance was excusable. And as he entered through the obvious front door, kicking it down with a grunt, he was met by a surprising sight. Not Slade henchmen, not even Slade himself. The room was large and mostly empty save a small white shape in the corner, stretched across a white mattress. And then he realized; it was a body. And then it truly hit Robin; that was Raven.

"RAVEN!" he yelled, running to the very far end of the room, only to be stopped by a gloved hand. "I'm sorry Robin, but Raven and I are rather busy right now. Perhaps you'd like to come back later." With that sentence he rose his hand and struck Robin down. Robin leaped back to his feet almost instantly, body pumping with adrenaline at the knowledge that Raven was here, and…he hated to admit it to himself…not moving. _Please, for the love of God, be asleep, be unconscious, just don't be..._

Slade once again raised a clenched fist, aiming for Robin's head, but Robin surprised him with a low kick at the legs. Slade stumbled, and Robin took advantage of this moment. He jumped at his archenemy, with a solid punch to the face and a well-aimed kick to the chest. Outraged, Slade fell. Robin slowly walked up to Slade's prone form, about to unmask him. A hand shot up and grasped Robin by the throat as Slade rose to his feet. He chuckled at his victory. He loved to win.

For a moment Robin's body was jerking uncontrollably as each breath became harder to draw. And then over Slade's shoulder, Raven came into his view once more. So small, helpless. And in a last effort, Robin managed to pull a birdarang from his belt and toss it where he could, and effective this maneuver was. The small object slit at Slade's throat.

Slade hissed and grasped at the bleeding, offended area, releasing Robin at the sudden pain. "You've won this time, Robin, " he hissed, "But not to worry, tell Raven that I will see her again very soon." And in a short blast of smoke, he was gone.

Robin was amazed at his victory, yet wasted no time to celebrate it. He rushed to the opposite side of the room, and his heart sank to the pit of his stomach when he finally realized something; Raven was not only decorated in cuts and bruises, but she was…naked. Robin felt as if he was invading her privacy, so he quickly unclipped his cape and draped it over her prone form, looking down at her with unfiltered concern in his eyes. Then he shook her side gently, but very firmly. He was afraid to hurt her- she was so pale that it seemed as though she would break.

"Raven…Raven…please wake up…please." He pleaded with her body, and then felt her pulse. It was weak, but it was definite. _She's alive_. The thought was relieving. He reached to a keyboard on the wall and typed in a quick combination, pleased when Raven's metal cuffs released her. Slowly and with the utmost care, Robin lifted Raven from the bed, the cape still wrapped securely around her.

He carried his lavender-locked beauty to his motorcycle, cradled her against his chest, and sped off into the night, whispering, "Don't worry Raven, we're going home."

**AN- Was that a pleaser? Sorry if the action scene was bad, it was my first one. And no worries, this story is not ending yet! R&R, tell me whatever, recommend me to your friends. =] I love all of you guys! (And I really hope that this chapter made sense!) Ciao!**


	5. Slow

**A/N- Well, here comes Existentialism. I only updated Predator first because it had only one chapter. **

Tortor- **Why thank you!**

RobRae4Ever!- **Agreed, Slade can't get away with this. There's much more to come!**

Tsuki-hime Neko- **Thanks, and you're about to see! **

Turquoise Blue 14- **Thanks, and haha, I won't. I don't really like those fics. They bother me for some reason. **

evilsangel- **Thanks!**

Rawr-Rina- **Thanks. **

Regina Lunaris- **It's all good, I agree. **

**I'd like to take a moment and thank all of you lovely reviewers, especially those who have reviewed multiple times on my first ever fanfiction! You know who you are. Now to what you have all been waiting for!**

Existentialism

Chapter 5: Slow

She awoke with a pang in her head and Slade on her breath. She saw him, felt him moving his body around hers, raising within her these terrible, god-awful _feelings_…

She was startled from her reverie by a call of her name.

"Raven! Are you awake?" Raven slowly opened her eyes to the calming décor of the Titan's medical bay. A strong gloved hand was grasping her own, and she sat up slowly on the thin hospital bed.

"Robin…?" Her voice was confused, bleary almost. His eyes went down to his shoes.

"I'm sorry, Raven. It wasn't a dream." Those words were horrible for her to hear. Despite her normal iciness, she grasped Robin's hand even tighter, fighting the tears that would make her appear as weak.

"Raven, it's going to be okay," he pulled her into a tight hug, and she could feel a few tears worm their way free of her protective barriers. Damn it. She sniffed, and they both pulled out of the hug simultaneously. Robin held her at arm's length. "Raven, you know you can talk to me about this, right? I won't judge anything you have to say." His voice was gentle, but firm. The voice of a true leader. Even now, Raven appreciated his calm in the situation.

She noticed that she was now fully clothed, and Robin answered a short, "Starfire," in response. Raven nodded, somewhat relieved.

She didn't want to say that she was afraid. But she knew that Robin understood even without the words. Another hug ensued, and Raven's fingers grasped tightly at Robin's replaced cape.

"Raven…?" she could tell the question was painful for him, and she understood it immediately. She turned away, shadows falling across her face. His gloved hand reached outwards towards her, almost pleading for an answer.

"No, Robin," she averted her eyes. "He was going to. But he didn't. You-," her voice broke slightly, "you got there in time." His hand found hers. It felt so small in his that he almost felt worried.

"Raven-I-," she silenced him with pleading eyes.

"Please, Robin. For the next few minutes, just don't say anything."

He rubbed her hand with his thumb in small soothing circles, and they both looked down at the gesture, then slowly rose to meet each other's eyes. The air was thick with silence.

And suddenly all tension broke as the other Titans rushed through the medical bay's door. Cyborg immediately ran to Raven's side and began checking her vitals, despite her half-hearted pleas of "Cyborg, I'm fine," with a raise of her hand.

Meanwhile, Starfire flitted about Cyborg as he checked Raven's health status, and Beast Boy stepped up to Raven herself.

"Dude, what happened?"

A look from Robin silenced him, but Raven laid her hand on the Boy Wonder's shoulder. _They will have to know eventually,_ her facial expression read.

Robin sighed deeply. "Okay, everyone. It's Raven's story, so please, let her go through with it."

Raven winced, then began. "I was in my room, and you were all on the mission…," Every Titan listened with undivided attention, and halfway through the telling of the story, Raven's hand slipped into Robin's. The story began to close, and hurt grew on Raven's face. He slit her body, she was chained to the bed…Raven could not finish. She rose and fled from the room, her teammates' faces still shocked at the news they had just heard. Robin got to his feet immediately and rushed out the door after her.

Beast Boy's young face was confused. "Um…dudes? Did that really just happen?"

()()()()()()

He found her exactly where he knew she'd be; her room. Robin opened the door with no regards to privacy, knowing that if she rejected his help that would only prolong the comfort he could provide.

Raven was on her bed, her back to him as it always seemed to be. Robin walked gently to her side and slowly sat on her bed. Cautiously, with the utmost care, he lifted his arm and put it over her shoulders. Raven looked up at him, and his stomach dropped when he noticed the tears on her cheeks. "Robin…," she whispered into his shoulder, "I'm…I'm afraid."

These words coming from his strongest teammate shocked him more than he would show. He pulled her into a sideways hug. They stayed in that position for a full twenty minutes, listening to the rain patter against the glass window.

"Robin…," his name escaped from her plump gray lips, "Will you stay with me?"

**A/N- Not in a perverted way! She's just sad. Okay, is it me or was there too much hugging here. I didn't feel a successful chapter in there, but I just don't like stuff that's besides the action. And I usually judge myself too harshly anyway. R&R, and tell your friends! Any plot ideas, shoot them in a review. **


	6. Edge

**A/N- Yes, another chapter. I figured I would keep trying for at least this story, because I know how much I hate it when stories are discontinued. So this chapter is dedicated to my lovely readers and reviewers who were so sad that Existentialism was at an end.**

**Disclaimer: TT was never mine, otherwise it would be too inappropriate for Cartoon Network. **

Existentialism

Chapter 6: Edge

As the sun rose, Raven became aware that she was in her room and she felt…safe, somehow. Then the reason came to her. A muscled arm was snaked around her waist, pulling her close to a mass of warmth. It was…Robin. A faint blush rose to her cheeks, and she almost wanted to pull away. But his hold was tight, and somewhat comforting. The thought made her cheeks redden once more.

"Raven. Are you awake?" His voice was deep and gravelly in its whisper. She could have sworn that she felt Robin's grip around her tighten.

"Yes," she replied quietly. For a long moment they silently lay in their intimate embrace.

"Robin?" asked pale lips.

"Yes?"

"Thank you…for staying with me," she said the words hesitantly, attempting to process what exactly should be said. She decided to leave her words alone for the moment.

"Anytime." The response made her smile. It was so utterly Robin, the rock always holding the team down to the little shreds of reality they clutched as crimefighters.

Suddenly, the arm was gone from her waist, the bed shifted, and she felt a loose strand of violet hair being pushed gently behind her ear. She rose slowly to a sitting position to look into Robin's masked eyes. She noticed with a pang that he was still in his rumpled costume from the previous night. But he didn't seem to care much about that. Instead he peered at her earnestly, kneeling next to her on the bed.

"Raven…," He was about to ask if she was okay, but decided against it. The question was so redundant, and in some ways, plainly insensitive. "…Want to go get some breakfast?"

She gave him a rare, full smile. "Sure. As long as no tofu is involved."

Robin helped Raven out of bed- she was still very sore, though he knew she would never admit it- and accompanied her downstairs as they playfully bantered about the most lighthearted of things. But deep inside, the wheels in Robin's mind were whirling. He was beyond happy that Raven seemed so cheerful at this moment. She must have had no memory of the nightmares that she had the previous night. Lucky for her. The very thought of her nightmares cause Robin to shiver.

She had been panting, shivering, sweating feverishly in her sleep. The blankets had twisted their way around her like a hungry serpent. So many times had she shouted the villain's name in her sleep that Robin grasped her hand and refused to let go. She had calmed considerably by the very early morning. Robin was scared that she wouldn't. He hadn't ever remembered being so scared for anyone before, not even himself.

The very idea of fear perplexed him.

Perhaps the past night was when Robin had realized how small Raven was. She curled up so tightly, and her pale body was so slim and fragile. The rock of a woman that was his best friend was so…delicate. The thought scared him even more.

But Robin forced himself to return to Earth and listen to what his violet-haired friend was saying. Right at the moment, all that truly mattered was keeping her sane and happy. The experience had been so traumatic for her that he hoped that the others wouldn't bombard her with questions.

As they entered the living room, the titans greeted them; perhaps a bit more interested in how Raven was feeling than usual, but they didn't say anything that would set Raven on edge. She was so fragile now, and he slid his hand into hers as they walked to the kitchen. The other titans observed this, but said nothing. Robin decided that Cyborg must have given Beast Boy and Starfire a long talk about how to act towards Raven at this time. He had to remember to thank him later.

"I know what'll be great right now, Rae! My homemade WAFFLES!" With a large grin, Cyborg took his place at the stove.

"No!" Beast Boy intercepted, "She doesn't want your waffles, she wants tofu bacon! Right, Rae? Come on, you know you love the tofu!"

Robin was pleased to note the small smile the slid onto Raven's face. He squeezed her hand gently, passing her a mug of herbal tea. She mouthed her thanks and turned to the bickering titans.

"Calm yourselves. Each of you make whatever you like, and I'll eat both." There was a smile in her voice as both of the self-proclaimed chefs went to work, humming happily in Cyborg's case, or singing offkey in Beast Boy's.

It was so familiar, and Raven knew that the breakfast was exactly what she needed. She couldn't remember how…no. Not now. Memories had to wait. For now, she was fine.

Starfire flew up beside her, grinning foolishly. "Do not worry, friend Raven!" she exclaimed, "We will catch the Slade and then-,"

The warm mug of tea crashed to the ground, showering fragments of white china and murky liquid across the once clean floor. Robin saw it all in a flash. Raven's face was confused, worried, nervous, pained, and then frightened. Only frightened. She fled at that moment in a whip of blue cape, the automatic doors shutting with a dull CLANG behind her.

Robin cursed, sending the neatly stacked plates on the counter to the floor with a swipe of his hand. They flew in a flurry of shattering white. He glared at the three of his friends in turn, lip curled up into a snarl. Never had the titans seen their leader so absolutely angry. It frightened each of them. Robin stormed out the door, presumably to follow Raven. To mend what was already so broken.

The three remaining titans had never felt worse.

**A/N- Hey, that wasn't so bad after all. So you all know, that wasn't Starfire bashing. In my opinion, she just jumped the gun and made an honest mistake. And never fear, our favorite villain will appear again soon. Please R&R, and reply or message me with any plot ideas. I think I'll still keep at least this story alive. =] **

**Love, **

_Ignite The Airwaves_


	7. Soon

**A/N- Back again! I've missed you all, but high school is quite a bit hectic, especially when there's all the after school stuff too. But here I am, and now is review time!**

**Whoever** Jaymon1600** is, (anonymous reviewer), please refrain from responding in all capitals demanding an answer to why I haven't continued a story that had already had one added chapter before you reviewed. **

Oxymoron Princess- **Thanks, and it's always great to have a new reviewer. **

SevenScars- **Why thanks! Great to see another new name!**

Tsuki- hime Neko- **Thanks ,that really means a lot. **

Alexisrose911- **Thanks.**

gwacie21- **And more is to come! **

evilsangel- **Here it comes, thanks!**

RobRae4Ever!- **Haha, we'll see about that. **

**Without further ado; the next installment. **

Existentialism

Chapter 7: Soon

The comfort had been even harder than he had expected. Robin had spent at least twenty minutes sitting on the edge of Raven's bed, her perched on the other side. The purple curtains were tightly drawn and Raven's cloaked form was rigid.

After twenty minutes, Robin had finally managed to move. He reached out a gloved hand to rest upon Raven's slender white one, but she immediately pulled away. Her skin was so cold. She began to shake, and Robin carefully rose and walked around the bed until he was facing Raven, on his knees in the thin carpet. He reached out towards her again, this time for both of her hands. Raven did not pull away this time, but instead looked down at their hands. Robin wished he could meet her eyes then, but her blasted hood was in the way as always. Words were on his lips; they tasted perfectly salty-sweet. Finally, the perfect words. But as the Boy Wonder opened his mouth to speak, what interrupted him but the flashing of red lights and cry of alarm.

She raised her head and finally her shining eyes met his.

"Trouble."

)()()()()()(

The titans assembled very quickly at the scene. By the docks was where the call had come from, and that immediately frightened Robin. No, he wouldn't say frightened. Frightened was a word for the meek. No, he was…intimidated?

_Oh, screw it, _Robin thought, _I am frightened. But it's for Raven, not me._ He turned his head towards the dark girl beside him. Her hood was still drawn, and it bothered him. But there were bigger things to worry about for the moment. He would just have to keep an eye on Raven during the oncoming battle, that was all. He desperately wanted to believe that it would be that easy.

It wasn't long before the voice drifted out from between the wooden crates, the voice they all knew so very well. "Well, Titans, it's been quite some time."

Robin stole a glance at Raven. Her face had gone pale. Robin's fists clenched. Her face had fueled the fire.

From there events developed to disastrous proportions. Cinderblock emerged from the stacks of crates, sending the wooden projectiles flying at the superhero team. He was followed of course by the customary hundreds of robotic henchmen. But as the titans surged towards the oncoming threat, Robin continued to make sure that Raven was always close, within his sight. He wasn't sure that he had ever felt this intense of a worry before.

Raven would never admit that she was afraid. But anyone would be able to tell by the way her hands trembled when they rose to cast a spell, the quivering of her lips. She was glad that Cinderblock was in no way someone they had to be concerned about fighting. He had fallen to them so many times. All on her mind was Slade. Her eyes were constantly darting about, seeking out any whisper behind her, the brush of wind.

Then the hands grabbed from behind, as she knew they would. Her hands were tight against her back, and she felt them press into Slade's muscular chest. He smirked beneath his mask at her feeble attempts.

"Just like old times, Raven, am I right?" His warm breath in her ear prickled the hair on her neck and she let out a small cry. No. Not again. Never again.

It only took the Boy Wonder, master detective that he was, three seconds to watch her be pulled into the shadows. The he leaped into action.

Slade would never admit it, but he was somewhat surprised when the birdarang sliced deep into his shoulder. His hands immediately flew up to the affected area, dropping Raven to her knees in the process. In a matter of seconds Raven had jumped to her feet, running the two yards to where Robin stood.

"Go." His voice was firm and demanding.

Raven's eyes widened. Never had Robin spoken like this to her. She felt more than obligated to obey. With a swish of her cloak, she had reappeared next to her friends who were slowly overpowering Cinderblock.

Slade was on his knees in front of Robin, ripping the birdarang out of his shoulder with a chuckle. "You can protect her all you want, Robin, but keep in mind that I always get what I want." His eye gleamed.

Robin snapped.

He sent a hard punch to the villain's face, satisfied at the resulting crunch. At the same time he threw out his knee into Slade's gut. The villain hunched over and let out a dry cough, obviously surprised. "Very clever, Robin. Attack when they're down. I taught you well."

"You. Didn't. TEACH ME!" Robin lashed out furiously, and slapped the villain so viciously that the orange mask split in two and crashed to the pavement. Slade's hand flew to his face. "Another time Robin. I promise that you will see me again." With that he was gone.

Cinderblock fell in the distance, and the Titans all appeared at Robin's side where he had knelt, staring at where Slade had been. Robin felt a small hand rest upon his shoulder, and turned back his head to see Raven's timid face. For a second they just looked at one another, and Robin quickly rose and pulled Raven into a tight hug. The other titans watched them, and they broke apart a long moment later. The silence was crisp and tense. And then Robin spoke.

"He'll never touch you again. I promise."

**A/N- Was that good, done too fast, terrible, hmmm? R&R, my friends out there. You writers know how much a review is appreciated. Does anyone have an idea for my plot? I might run dry soon. Until later, **

_Ignite The Airwaves_


	8. Darkness

**A/N- I know that a lot of people couldn't review on the last chapter, and I believe that is because I removed the chapter with my author's note, thus making the last chapter chapter 7, which they had already reviewed. There should be no such problems with this one.**

Tsuki- hime Neko- **Thanks, and the plot ideas were super helpful.**

evilsangel- **Thanks!**

Regina lunaris- **Thanks!**

RobRae4Ever! – **Haha, I'll try to get right on that. **

SevenScars- **Thanks, haha. **

TeenTitans5- **Thanks, great to hear this kind of stuff.**

RobxRae450000- **Thanks! **

morphious444- **I am trying to make my chapters longer- I just like ending it when I feel the chapter is done. But I'll work on that, and thanks!**

**If I didn't answer everyone, that's because the reviews got all messed up. Thanks to my lovely reviewers! Thanks to **Tsuki- hime Neko**, because you made this chapter possible. **

Disclaimer I always forget: **If I owned Raven, she would be everyone's favorite character because I would make her as cool as possible. **

Existentialism

Chapter 8: Darkness

The dark was the hardest part. Raven had once enjoyed the night, but now she couldn't stand its all- encompassing aura. It shrouded any chance of safety, any feeling of self-comfort. She was scared, although she would never admit it. She had felt defenseless for much too long a time now, and it was taking its toll on her. She didn't do fear, right? No, she was Raven. Then why was she so uncertain? Why the sudden doubt?

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She was in the tower. She was safe. She just didn't want to be comforted right now, didn't want to be one of those girls that fell apart in the arms of friends that were at a loss of how to even begin her healing. No. Her fists clenched until nails drew blood from her palms. She was not that weak. How could she allow one incident to affect her so greatly? She knew what to do now. She would go right down to the main room and sit down on the couch, maybe read a book. She would show her friends that she wouldn't let past events affect her.

But as she reached for a forgotten, leather-bound book, Raven faltered. Was that a noise that she had just heard? A scuttle across the floor? No, now she was just being paranoid. Darkness had always been her friend, right?

Then a hand closed tight around her wrist, and she let out a piercing screech.

From their living room the Titans could hear the offended noise, and they raced towards Raven's bedroom, each fearing for their friend's life while their enemy was still at large. When Robin kicked down her door, as the dust parted, they were all met with a surprise. Their normally strong friend was huddled into a ball on the floor, tears streaming down her pale cheeks. Immediately Starfire knelt by her weeping friend, whispering to her softly. As Cyborg scanned the room for any foreign objects, Beast Boy morphed into a bloodhound, sniffing at the dark purple carpet.

Robin knelt by Raven, and Starfire instinctively moved aside, rising to her feet. "Raven," he was forceful with his words, yet gentle all the same, "Tell me what happened."

Her whole body shook as she attempted to even out her breathing. "Slade…," she rasped, "He was here!" Robin's face twisted to an expression of pure hatred and loathing. He rose, and Starfire returned to her previous position, comforting the sobbing girl.

Cyborg nudged Robin, and Robin turned to face his cybernetic friend. Cyborg looked utterly baffled. "Robin…," he murmured, shuffling his weight uncomfortably. He seemed quite tall in the low-ceiling room.

"What?" he demanded impatiently.

Cyborg lowered his voice so the others wouldn't hear him. "Slade was never in here, Rob. No one ever touched her. I have the feed from the security camera playing right now, right on my arm."

Robin tore his eyes away, looking at the now silent but still shaking girl.

"Could there be a reagent?" he asked quietly, his eyes searching her.

"No chance for Slade to have activated it. There was nothing in her blood when she came back to the tower, and she hasn't come into contact with anything since then." He was looking at the panel on his arm. Robin had to admit that there was absolutely nothing irregular in her bloodstream. It couldn't be a reagent. After all, Slade wasn't one for repeating old tricks.

"Guys, leave me alone with Raven for a minute." Robin tore his eyes away from Cyborg's data. The titans obeyed, if reluctantly. They were still concerned, as good friends should be, though one knew more than the others.

Robin waited until the door had been reaffixed behind them to speak. Raven had timidly risen to her feet. "Raven, do you promise me that you saw Slade?"

She looked bewildered at the question. "I sensed him, I know-,"

Robin cut her off brusquely, placing his hands firmly on her shoulders. "But did you _see_ him?"

"No, but what should that matter? I know what I felt-,"

"No, Raven! What if you were wrong?! What if you were so worried that now you think he's there when he isn't, and you're all-,"

"Obsessed?"

His face fell at the thrice accursed word. Of course when defending herself, she brought up what he thought of as his own dark moment. Damn it. She knew that he still felt guilty, and she exploited it. Screw him for not seeing it coming. He was Robin, right? He was supposed to see this kind of thing coming.

"No, not obsessed, Raven, I just-," His protest was interrupted when she raised her pale hand out in front of him.

"Leave." She was foreboding in tone.

He gaped at her. "Raven, I was just trying to-,"

"Go. Now. Before I lose my temper."

Robin hung his head and walked through the repaired doorway, listening as it slammed shut behind him. Shit. He had lost her. Raven had been vulnerable, but she had been listening. She had been opening up to him. And now, with one petty argument, he had reincarnated the Ice Queen.

As Robin commenced to feel annoyed with himself, Raven shakily sat down on her bed, looking at her trembling hands, marks from her nails still twisting into them with an angry red. She was not deaf- as a matter of fact, she heard every word that Robin and Cyborg had been quietly exchanging. Had she really only imagined Slade's presence? The hand had felt so real. But there was no angry red mark on her wrist as she had thought there would be. Was she going insane? Her hands felt cold, very cold. She rubbed them together out of habit. Raven exhaled very slowly, eyes closed. _Am I going insane? No, I can't, I can, will I, have I, was I always?_

The sun peeked slowly over the horizon as Raven buried her head in her hands to the quiet murmurings of her friends below.

**A/N- I feel like that was effective, right? She's doubting herself now, and as soon as she tried to convince herself that she was strong, she fell right back down again. I don't like seeing her this vulnerable either, but I'm pretty sure I'll have her strengthen up soon. Maybe not, but we'll have to see where the story takes me. Thoughts? R&R! Until next time, **

_Ignite the Airwaves_


	9. Whisper

**A/N- Whoo, the last chapter was pretty intense! I guess I'm one for the angst. Ah, the years of high school. And now for the general review thank yous; thank you to **gwacie21, buddybuddy96, morphious44, RobRae4Ever!, evilsangel, Regina Lunaris, **and **animallover12** for your wonderful reviews**. **IgniteTheAirwaves is made happy by this.** ** For the more specific reviews:**

SevenScars- **Thanks, and thanks for all your help with the ideas!**

Tsuki-hime Neko- **Hah, I can spell your username now without looking at the review page. That makes me happy. And haha, I understand just what you mean. There's something so satisfying to it…**

Disclaimer**- If I owned the Teen Titans, there would be a very cool, non-stupid looking Raven costume for adults as well as a better one for kids. **

**And here we go…! This chapter took longer than usual (like spanned over a few days) so I hope that it's good enough.**

Existentialism

Chapter 9: Whisper

She knew that they were talking about her; it was blatantly obvious. Whenever Raven would enter the control room, what had just been loud voices would die down to harsh whispers. Glances would be thrown about, cautiously of course. But Raven was more than skilled at reading faces. They had to know that she couldn't be fooled, and that made it hurt just a bit more. They knew that she knew her meeting with Slade was their prime topic of conversation, yet they carried on anyway. It seemed insensitive, cruel even.

Yes, the Ice Queen had been doubting herself. After she had forced Robin to leave her room, the empath had sat on her bed for hours, head in hands, thinking about every movement that she had thought she felt, thought she knew. The brush of a hand on her shoulder, had it just been a slight breeze? Had the rustle behind her been the slightest stirring of birch white pages in the open book upon her bureau? So very white, so white- she fingered them gently, her long pallid fingers stroking the ivory pages. For many minutes she lost herself in that simple motion, until the hoot of a distant owl drew her to reality once more.

Fingers trembling, she dropped the book to the floor. It was so loud when it collided with the thick carpet. Everything was so loud, so unrealistic. She couldn't be imagining, no! She refused to be crazy, absolutely refused. What if the other titans decided that she wasn't sane anymore, couldn't fight anymore? Would they kick her out? Even if they didn't, and she couldn't fight, she would still find a way to leave. No matter how much it would hurt.

_Dammit, Raven, you're getting ahead of yourself_, she mentally berated. After all, who was to say it would come to that? Her teammates knew that she had experienced a great amount of trauma; maybe they would just let it slide. She noticed that they often seemed to make exceptions in her case- for mental explosions, disrespect, anger. Maybe she was the unstable one of the group.

Raven rose to her feet.

No. She would not let herself think like this. That was exactly what Slade wanted, she knew. He wanted them to be confused just so he could strike again. Harder, like always. And she realized that that was exactly how he had eluded them for so long. Slade preyed on weakness; that much was obvious. However, he always set a situation that would leave the titans lost, confused, bewildered- always right before a big attack.

Raven exited her room now, stride increasing in speed with every footstep. And her footsteps began a crescendo as she neared the control room. She knew she was getting closer; she could hear the whispers. For one of the first times, she could not hear video games blasting away in the background, but did not allow this oddity to hinder her. Everyone's minds were occupied at the moment, no matter how foolishly they normally acted.

The room fell silent upon her entrance, but at this point Raven had grown used to it. She had tried her best to enter at the times the room would not be occupied, but it seemed that none of them had moved. Their eyes were boring into her, and she could feel it all- concern, understanding, sympathy, disbelief.

"Raven?" There was Mr. Concern in person, his head cocked to the side as if reading her face. She wanted to laugh. There was no way he would _ever_ be able to read her so clearly.

"Everyone," her voice was dry; she cleared her throat loudly, and recommenced, "I don't know what really happened, or what I may have seen, but for now-," she glanced over at Robin, "For now we should all just focus our energy on finding Slade." It took all of Raven's control to keep her stomach from turning, keep eyes from glowing a bright crimson. Only Robin noticed her clenched fists, so tight that they were going white.

At this small speech, the titans turned to their fearless leader. He seemed bewildered for a moment, and that surprised them. Robin was the one who always knew what to do next, right? A pause, and then the Boy Wonder spoke.

"I think that as of right now, Raven has the right mindset. But before we search for Slade, I think we may just need a night of relaxation." He could feel Raven's thought of his hypocrisy in the shifting of her weight. "Just a quiet night in the tower."

"Yes," Starfire perked up, pirouetting into the air, "And I will fetch the unhealthy sugar candies for all!" Robin reached out an arm to stop her, but the happy redhead was already in the kitchen throwing open cupboards, muttering to herself in her native tongue.

Raven looked like she was about to say something, but Robin seated himself down at the computer before she could. "Cyborg, are we good to lock down for the night?" he asked.

"Yeah, man," Cyborg began, "Let me just check-oh no."

Robin was at his side in an instant. "What happened?"

Cyborg pointed to a bleeping red dot on the screen. "Someone- don't ask me how- someone broke into the tower."

Then came the tone of voice that all of the titans hoped that they would never hear from their leader again. That voice full of bloodlust. "Slade."

"You're quite correct, Robin," a cool voice greeted from the shadows. The titans immediately reverted to their normal battle stances; Robin in front, legs crouched, ready to spring. Cyborg just to his right, one arm steadying his sonic cannon. Beast Boy a snarling leopard to his left, Starfire floating above him with a green starbolt in formation. Raven at the rear, her hood pulled tight over her head, hands out and expectant.

Slade laughed from his hiding place. "It's quite admirable that you all believe you can defeat me."

"We have and we will!" Robin yelled, his bo staff at the ready.

Slade merely chuckled once more. "When, my apprentice? If you all had ever truly beaten me, I wouldn't be here right now, now would I?" Raven could feel a tide of Robin's anger. It was emanating off of him in waves, and his entire body was shaking in the effort to remain calm. Raven couldn't restrain herself from speaking any longer.

"Come out wherever you are, Slade," she spat. Her teammates were surprised, although they didn't show it. The damned bastard laughed again.

"Oh, sweet Raven. Have you missed me?" The eyes were just behind her, and Raven leapt. With a scream of power, her black-shrouded hand punched towards Slade's face, and he staggered back slightly in surprise as her fist made contact with his mask. It was quite an impact; he had thought that he had broken her already, and she would be of no concern. Slade's expression hardened. No matter. This time, he would just have to make sure that she would _stay_ broken.

At this point, the other titans had seen Slade and now stood protectively behind Raven. A yell of "Titans, Go!" set them into action, and Raven begrudgingly resumed her position in the rear. She would strike. She would just have to wait.

First a green rhinoceros surged forward, Starfire twirling dangerously just behind him. Beast Boy slammed into Slade's side, and the villain remained quite unfazed. He caught the boy by his horn, thrusting him backwards into the tower's far wall. Next the Tamaranian flew at him, and after deftly dodging a starbolt, he grabbed the slim girl by her orange wrist. For a second his eyes skimmed over her form, as if evaluating something, then launched her across the room right to where Beast Boy had fallen. Next Cyborg and Robin ran up. Raven was itching to get in the fight, but still watched from overhead.

Cyborg and Robin had a good plan; their sonic boom technique had greatly improved over the years. Now it had become a feared move to their enemies. Once again, they executed it flawlessly; but they were aiming for Slade. And of course, the man disappeared into thin air just as the attack would have made an impact. Instead, he appeared behind Cyborg and pulled his arm behind him, then narrowly sliced the man down with a hard punch to the back. The teen crumpled to the ground almost instantly, leaving Robin blocking Slade's path. Slade seemed to smile.

The boy was so predictable. Slade caught the bo staff with both hands as it came hurtling toward him, and flicked his wrists so that Robin's own wrists twisted painfully. He let out a cry, and Raven's hands rose. But she knew that there was a chance of her hitting Robin by accident if she tried to fight now. And she couldn't risk that.

Slade took Robin down skillfully and efficiently. Only a moment had passed before Robin had received a rather nasty boot to the chest. It looked like a hit that would do more than bruise, especially when taking into account its horrible noise.

But in a sickening way, Raven was glad that Robin had been taken down. Just because that meant that it was her turn. She disappeared in a cloud of black and reappeared just behind the villain. "You're going down," she whispered from behind, hands raised.

"Oh, Raven," he smirked, "You needn't be so seductive. Don't worry, I won't hesitate to-," Her fist caught him off guard. It smashed hard into his gut, and he had to admit that he was impressed. He caught the wrist, however, and pulled it behind the girl's head, twisting it down to her lower back. Raven gritted her teeth, but refused to scream. Her struggles were violent and angry as a rabid dog.

The villain leaned over, his cool breath in her ear. "I could take you, right now, in front of your friends. Would you like that, Raven?" Her breaths were husky, but not quite as irregular as he would have liked. He wanted to taste that fear that he was so used to spreading. But where was it now? What had happened?

And that was when Raven snapped. Her black aura spread up Slade's body, wrenching him away from her and onto the ground. The girl then lifted him again with her powers and slammed him into the tower wall, holding him there firmly, glaring with loathing. There was a loud silence for a moment.

And suddenly, something from beyond her view. A sizzling. Raven turned her head to see a perfect hole through her cloak's edge. Slade pocketed the small handgun and took advantage of Raven's distraction, running to her and tearing her cloak away. _Keep tearing, and I'll get her down on her knees again. _Raven viciously fought the hands that twisted her arms across her chest and across each other, but Slade was still quite strong in his grip. One of his hands wandered lazily down her side and rested at her hip, squeezing it rather roughly before tearing away some of the leotard that lay around it. "Raven. Are you afraid?"

Her breath was fluttering in her throat, but she refused to fall to him this time. "No," she breathed, body shaking. He wouldn't take her now, right? Not in front of her friends. He couldn't.

The thrice accursed hand roamed until it cupped Raven's breast and squeezed until she let out a traitorous moan. "I could take you right now. I could have you whenever I want. Do not forget that." Slade pushed her to the ground and was gone.

The other titans had been about ready to attack again.

As Robin worriedly rose, he noticed that Raven looked scared. But as her trembling subsided, she looked nothing but defiant. A very odd sort of defiance. And as his other teammates rose to their feet, he couldn't help but wonder; was this defiance a good thing, a strength? Or should he and the titans be very, very worried?

**A/N- Wow, longer than usual. Much longer. I really hope that the battle scene didn't suck, guys. Yeah…I think it did. Well, guess I'll just have to keep practicing. R&R, with ideas and suggestions! And until next time,**

_Ignite The Airwaves_


	10. To Speak

**A/N- Finally here! I didn't forget, I was just totally uninspired. General review thanks to** Tsuki-hime Neko, buddybuddy96, Marro, RxR40009090, funnyjunkie, RobRae4Ever!, Regina lunaris, morphious444, and evilsangel.

SevenScars**- The drawing is almost done? Great! And thanks for all the ideas again! **

**Once again, sorry for all the delay! I didn't forget, I just forgot. Haha. **

Existentialism

Chapter 10- Heart-to-Heart

The return to Titans Tower was both silent and discreet. All of the Titans had opted to ride the T-Car, as they were worn out from battle. At moments Robin would worriedly cast his eyes to Raven, but she would only meet him with a cold stare. He was worried. And that was an understatement.

As the team silently filtered into the control room, he pondered this more deeply. She was trying to fight off her fears, and that was a great improvement. However, she couldn't let the feelings overtake her. He knew that by experience.

Didn't she? All of her life, Raven had needed to control her inner demons. Could she not realize what a demon such as the current one would make her become?

Each of the team members took their own place on the couch, silent until Starfire spoke, "Raven, please, are you undamaged?" All eyes went to the girl. Robin had to admit that Raven looked terrible- her uniform was ripped in numerous, normally disguised areas, her cloak merely scraps of scarred blue.

"I'm fine, Starfire," she answered curtly, arms crossed. Robin didn't like the way that she answered, as if speaking to someone inferior, but no one else seemed to notice.

"Then BB, how about some Gamestation?" Cyborg cockily said to the green boy.

That was all it took for the Titans to return to a sense of normalcy. The two resident gameplayers took up their places as Starfire cheered from the sidelines. Raven turned to retreat to her room, and as she left, Robin slowly got to his feet to follow her.

"Good luck with her, Rob," Cyborg called as he left.

Robin nodded. He was sure going to need it.

He had let Raven escape to her room long before he had left the control room solely to allow her to decide whether or not to let him in. He wanted her to not feel like it was serious, just a talk between friends.

But were they friends? He wanted them to be more, but were they truly even friends? The thought hurt, and he decided there was only one way to find out. He rapped three times on her door, the knocks brisk and staccato.

"Robin?"

"Yeah, it's me."

Her door whooshed open, and he stepped inside, moving towards the black silhouette on the purple-blanketed bed. He slowly took a seat next to her, and she turned to him.

"Robin, what's wrong?"

"Why would you automatically assume that something was wrong? Can't we just have a conversation?"

She looked at him for a long moment. "Maybe on the roof or in the kitchen, but never in my room. So, Boy Wonder, what appears to be the problem?"

For a moment he wanted to address what he had noticed earlier, then suddenly decided against it. He wanted a different conversation, and besides; Raven now seemed to be herself again. So Robin glanced around the sparsely lit room and asked, "Raven, do you consider us…friends?"

Raven quirked an eyebrow. That question was not one that she had been expecting. She glanced at the Boy Wonder's face; he seemed purely curious.

"Well, Robin, what do you think?"

He was irritated, but only slightly as her intentions were cunning; she was trying to bring him into a circle. "I think that I asked you first, Raven."

She chuckled. Raven had to admit, Robin could not be deterred. So she took a long moment, and really thought about the question. Robin had saved her so many times, they had shared so many intimate conversations; he had rescued her from Slade. That could not be forgotten. And he had cared for her through her bouts of insanity as a result of the man's brutal attack.

"I believe so," she finally responded.

"Raven…," he took time with his words, attempting to be as gentle as possible when stirring up memories, "When I rescued you from Slade that night, you wouldn't believe how worried I was. And that- well, that made me think a little more. About how truly _worried_ I was. How I didn't want to lose you."

She was speechless. He couldn't possibly be implying…No, that was impossible. How could Robin, the team's leader, have feelings for her? She had long concealed any of her own feelings for him, and believed that she had done rather well. Sometimes, she had even convinced herself.

"Well," she hesitated, "Of course you were. After all, you're the leader of this team, and you have to look after your teammates. It's our responsibility to watch out for each other." Her words were timid, and she was worried that the response would disappoint her.

"Raven…," he hesitated, and reached for her hand, holding it in both of his. The motion shocked her too much to gather a response. "Raven, I think so too. However, sometimes I find myself looking out for you more than anyone else." Her eyes sparked, and he backpedaled a bit. "Not that you need protection of course."

For a long moment Robin was insanely worried. She wasn't saying anything. And then suddenly, with a choked sob, the lavender-haired beauty threw her arms across him tightly. HE was amazed at the emotional before he heard the stifled, "I was so afraid. I was so afraid."

And Robin clutched the sobbing girl in his arms, stroking her beautiful hair, murmuring, "Don't worry, Raven. I'll keep you safe. You'll never have to be afraid again.

**A/N- That felt a bit fractured…but I may just need some inspiration for this story. It'll come soon. My story Battle Scars is the place to be right now if you want something that's getting great. Thanks for all the reviews.**

**Until next time,**

_Ignite The Airwaves_


	11. Planning

**A/N- I'm finally back, plowing through my midterms. I decided that you guys deserved an update. General thanks to **buddybuddy96, Regina lunaris, Marro, RobRae4Ever, morphious444, SevenScars, WhiteTigerXOXO, **and** evilsangel.

XDark-Titan- **Thanks, and I think it's safe to say that she's my favorite Titan. I feel that besides Robin, she's the only character for whom they went so far as to give a third dimension.**

**As always, it's great to still hear from new reviewers. And without any further ado…**

Existentialism

Chapter 11: Planning

The amount of things that had transpired had not yet fully registered in Robin's mind. He thought of moments ago when he had held the girl tightly, absorbing her suppressed fears. He considered whether or not her affection for him resulted from her love or a desire to be protected. He wondered if there was any possible way for him to fully protect her. But although Robin was thinking of many things, he was constantly reminded of one undeniable fact; Slade was waiting to attack.

Why Raven? Robin could definitely understand it; Raven was beautiful and powerful. But then again, so was Starfire. Perhaps Slade wanted the larger challenge of the two, the girl so much harder to break. Perhaps Slade wanted to play with darkness.

Robin still couldn't understand this man-no, this _criminal_, the one who was such a friend of manipulation and brother to pain.

And then it occurred to Robin that there had been an attack in the Tower, and therefore, he had failed Raven, failed the girl whose name knotted his stomach.

He had broken his promise.

He had promised that Slade would never touch her again- yet he had not prevented it in the slightest when the villain had infiltrated their very home. He just couldn't decide how Slade would strike, why the man needed to be so cryptic. Had it been any other criminal that had accosted Raven in this manner, Robin was sure that said criminal would be missing a few limbs. What was it about Slade that made him so dangerous, so intimidating?

And that was when Robin's eyes widened, when he made a decision and decided just how the Titans were finally going to bring Slade down.

The team accepted the plan with an air of renewed hope; Robin could tell that a fresh idea had been what they needed all along. He was worried at how easily Raven accepted her part- had it not been absolutely necessary for her to carry it out, then he never would have condoned it.

So dangerous…but all missions were risky, right?

The plan was really quite simple, beautifully simple in fact. The role that each Titan was to play highlighted their personal character very nicely, and therefore made the ploy very believable. And if Robin's suspicions were correct, the plan could work even better than expected if reinforced.

Robin smirked. He felt intelligent now, although his worry for his teammates continually threatened to cloud his judgment. They were superheroes, each of them could care for themselves. Including Raven. He had to keep reminding himself of that fact.

()()()()()

Raven refused to be afraid, so instead felt a hollow excitement for the night approaching. The plan was truly quite brilliant, although she was playing quite a large role in the proceedings. She knew that she just had to keep breathing. The reminder that the plan would effectively get rid of Slade was the one constant that kept her determined.

As nighttime approached and she donned her blue cloak, she mentally reviewed the plan one last time before speaking aloud in her room, "Slade can't hurt them. I need to go find him for myself." And though to anyone these words may have registered odd, as the girl teleported from her room, a red light on her wall blinked alongside a camera lens; of course, just as Robin suspected.

As Raven appeared in the town, she briefly wondered if such a hidden camera existed, and then thought, _Wait, if he watched me in my bedroom…he saw me change!_ Her fists clenched, which she had to admit must have improved the quality of her acting debut.

"Come out, Slade," she yelled, her voice echoing across the empty block, "If you want me so badly, come out and finish me." Her legs were jelly, though there was no way that anybody could have known by looking at her. The air around her was too still, too silent. "Come and get me! What are you waiting for?" She heard her voice- it seemed so shrill. Where could he be? He couldn't possibly know their plan-

And then she heard it. The step behind her. She let the large hands encompass her wrists, hoping beyond hope that the other titans would follow through now that the first phase was completed.

"Oh, Raven," he breathed, "No need to beg. I am here now, and I'll be sure to make this pleasurable for _both_ of us." She couldn't help but shudder, and he smirked beneath his mask.

"Are you afraid?"

"Never."

His mask brushed against the side of her face. "You will be."

Raven felt her feet leave the ground, and her eyes reopened to a gray wall, head pounding. Raven decided that he must have knocked her unconscious. Then she realized that she was lying across another hard white cot. She grit her teeth to keep from crying out.

_They are coming they are coming I will be fine because they are coming and no he will not hurt me again I won't let him they won't let him _Robin_ won't let him…_

She felt the man's body shadow over hers, and she shuddered. He hadn't restrained her powers yet. That was a foolish mistake, a rookie mistake. Still fully dressed, he evaluated her so hungrily with his eyes that she shivered.

"Finally Raven, I have you." He clasped the power-resistant cuffs around her wrists, shackling her to the headboard. She kept back a smile. He had waited too long to do that, he would figure that out soon enough. Already the small object had teleported out of sight.

"I just have one question before we commence, Raven," Slade said, slowly fingering a lock of her lavender hair, "You have always seemed so stubborn. Why come straight to me?"

She said what she knew he expected. "I saw how easily you took the titans down," it was so hard to keep a knowing smirk from her face, "And I figured to come to you and stop this before they get hurt." She made sure her face was twisted into a convincing expression.

"Oh, Raven. You're a horrible liar."

"I…I don't know what you're talking about," she choked, panic fleeting through her eyes.

"Raven, I am not a fool. The titans have a plan, and do not worry. It will not come to pass. You will not win." He put his face next to her, and she cringed.

"And now, Raven, I believe that there is still something left for us to accomplish."

**A/N- Was it totally devious to end there? I may be super nice and update as soon as tomorrow. I'm very much in the mood. Leave your thoughts.**

**Until next time, **

_Ignite The Airwaves_


	12. The Rush

**A/N- Okay, I'm writing quickly because the rain is so terrible that I'm afraid the power is going to go out in the middle. There aren't many reviews to respond to because I'm updating within one day of the last chapter! Make sure you read the one before this too. A general thank you to **Regina lunaris, XDark-Titan,** and **buddybuddy96**. **

Tsuki- hime Neko**- It's quite all right. And no. Hah, I've wondered the same thing. **

SevenScars**- Thanks for understanding. **

morphious444**- I sent you a PM. **

animallover- **You sent the review while I was writing this. Haha. **

**I've made you wait long enough.**

Existentialism

Chapter 12: The Rush

Robin was concerned. Sure, Slade's teleportation belt had appeared right on schedule, teleported right onto the couch of the tower. But he couldn't help but think that something was horribly wrong. It was just a premonition, right? But they were dealing with Slade.

"Rob, if we go now, the whole plan'll be blown," Cyborg gripped his friend by the shoulder, "I know you're worried, but Rae's tough, and everything seems good so far." The wind howled outside, as if trying to pitch in its own advice.

Robin sighed. "You're right, Cy. I just can't help worrying. I…I keep thinking of that first time last month, when if I hadn't gone she would have-," he cut off, a grim look about his face.

"We know. But man, you just have to trust her. This plan is perfect, we've gone over every incidental. You need to stop worrying already."

"Yes, Robin," Starfire chimed in brightly, "I understand your concern, but friend Raven is indeed quite strong and the Slade will not be likely to hurt her." Robin nodded mutely, eyes cast on the thundering rain pelting the window. He hadn't seen a storm this bad in a very long time. The tower was lit only by flickering yellow candlelight. He was so impatient. They were all right, of course. Waiting was essential to the plan. He passed his finger gently over the flame, listening to the silence of his friends, when a crash of thunder caused all of their heads to shoot up as it struck the very tip of their island.

Starfire was the first to speak. "Friends, was that lightning truly…black?" They didn't respond, and there was a long pause.

"Titans, screw the plan, we're going in." Robin was already pulling on his R-Cycle's helmet.

"But-," Beast Boy protested.

"That was Raven's magic. Everyone saw it. Now no arguing. We need to move," Robin answered brusquely.

"But couldn't it be a trap?" Beast Boy said, "I mean, wouldn't her powers be restrained to the point where she couldn't do that anyways?"

Robin grunted in response. "If you guys want to save Raven, I'll go by myself. But if you want to make sure Slade can never touch her again, you may want to join me." They shuddered collectively as his words brought back the impact of that night almost a month ago. Robin exited the room, his team behind him.

None of the titans had ever seen such weather. The park's trees were groaning against the wind, fighting viciously to stay upright, and the rain was pelting the gravel with such a heavy ferocity that Robin was surprised it bore no wounds. Navigation on his R-Cycle was near to impossible, but he kept his head and eyes forward, to where they had tracked her communicator. They thought that they had tricked Slade…but what if the communicator signal was false? What if he wanted them to come find Raven?

What if they were too late?

Robin cursed and swerved the R-Cycle . Dammit. The streets were flooding, and the raindrops were coming down so quickly that they appeared as lines shooting down from the sky. Didn't the clouds have to go away soon? How could those clouds hold so much water? It was odd, definitely. He could hear the T-Car speeding along behind him, and he felt empowered.

_Slade is going down. _

()()()()

It was cold, so cold. That was one thing she wasn't likely to forget. The rain was thudding dully on the tin roof, as if trying to break through the rust. The man knew that he had foiled the plan. And now, now he was taking his sweet time.

Raven was trying so hard not to move, not to scream. But how can you hold back screams when a murderous bastard is tugging a knife down your arm with practiced skill? When his mask is gone, his breath is on your face, and it's hot, but it's too dark to even see those eyes. Only feel.

And she was feeling so much that she was sure she would never be able to feel again. Fear musk sweat heat weight shift. She tried so hard to think only thoughts of her friends, her lovely, lovely friends, whom she prayed would get some message or some sign of her distress. As each minute passed, and her blood met air, as in her mouth the blood ran metallic, as she struggled for air, she knew that soon the sinful deed would begin, soon she would be tainted.

While she was glad that she could not see what this hateful man was doing, she almost wished for sight, because the darkness made her feel different, like none of it was real. How sick would it be if she woke up to find all of this only a dream? Raven did not put much into that idea.

"Raven," the man murmured, "I know of your past, as well as your future." He touched a lock of her lavender hair, almost sensually. She pinched her eyes tightly, refusing to speak. He laughed. "Oh, sweet Raven, the darkness is prominent within you. You can feel it. Why not submit? I can train you. Not as an apprentice, Raven, not even as the outcast on a metahuman team, but as an equal." His words were low, conspiring. She knew this tone, and it filled her head thick with protest. Where were her friends?

"Oh, Raven, where are your friends now?" he laughed, "It seems I have scared them away. If I were you, I would never go back to them, cowards that they are." She scrunched her eyes tight, willing the words away. But then she noticed among the sticky red that though the pain was white and breeding under her skin, there was no new pain. The blade was gone. And now there were hands. And now Fear ate at her heart. She was getting colder, so much colder, and her coverings were being ripped away by savage hands. Savage, lusting, thrusting. And now it hurt, everywhere it hurt and throbbed and she screamed and screamed and how were the walls not falling?

And then it was done, and he laughed, and she whimpered. The rain had faded to the background. The cot was dyed red, and the room stank of death. Her ribs felt like they were scraping her insides with every breath, and every single cell of her body was screaming. Her lips were red, bruised, blistered.

And then the blissful white light broke through. It was too bright for a second, and she was afraid. But then the light dimmed. And there they stood.

From there it was all a blur.

She could hear the scuffles, the angry yells, slaps of armor and skin. Saw green light in the corner of her eyes, felt her cuffs tighten and then release. Then there was a curse, and then silence. With hesitation, her eyes slowly opened. Everything seemed so hazy, including the vivacious green and red in front of her. The purple of the spectrum gasped.

"Raven…,"

She felt strong arms go beneath her form and lift her from the cot. She gasped for air, and her head spun. The next few words were mere murmurs, but she caught the last sentence perfectly.

"I don't know, but the chances are slim."

**A/N- So, there you are! Will she live? Did Slade just take off her clothes, or did he rape her? You'll have to wait and see. Thanks all you lovely reviewers. **

**Until next time, **

_Ignite The Airwaves_


	13. Unlucky

**A/N- Sorry it took me so long. My grandfather passed away, and the funeral was only a few days ago. It's been crazy. I left you all on quite a cliffhanger last time though, so I had to update. General review thanks to **RobRae4Ever!, Tsuki-hime Neko, buddybuddy96, Regina lunaris, Marro, morphious444**, and **music of silence**. I love all of you so much. And I won't keep you waiting any longer. **

**Disclaimer: Heh, forgot about these, but nothing is mine.**

**Oh my god. I named chapter 13 Unlucky. I am **so **clever. Ha. **

Existentialism

Chapter 13: Unlucky

It was purely unlucky, that was the harsh reality. The teens stood clustered around the cot in the Medical Bay of Titans' Tower. If the majority of the teens had not been male, they most definitely would have been holding hands. If they were religious, maybe they would have been praying. Her chances were slim. Cyborg had said so.

Robin had never put much stock in religion. But still, he prayed silently, eyes squeezed shut as if the sheer force he was exerting would make his prayer even stronger. She was so still on the bed, and her lovely body was so destroyed. They had wanted to clothe her, but the emergency was so great that there hadn't been enough time. Besides, and Robin cringed to admit it, the blood covered her so that nothing could really be seen.

Blood. In all of his years as a crime fighter, even dealing with Batman himself, Robin had never seen so much blood. It was terribly red, so vivid that had it been shown in a movie, Robin would have deemed it terribly fake. It didn't look real; he wished that it wasn't real. But it was. And there she was, her chest rising and falling with an uncalculated hitch.

The silence in the room was cold. Robin's head was in his hands, and he was whispering words that no one could understand, words in a language Raven could have identified as Hebrew. Starfire was speaking in a different tongue as well, and Beast Boy looked confused as to how he could pray and make it feel just as special. Finally, he settled on just using English. _Please, god, let her be okay she's Raven she's always okay I'll even stop telling her jokes and annoying her all the time, I promise…_

Cyborg, however, had no time to pray. He was doing everything in his power to keep their beloved friend alive. Her stats were falling, and he was beyond himself. He couldn't test her to determine anything about the nature of her injuries, he just needed to work the best and fastest that he could.

The beeping in the room was growing consecutively louder, and everyone seemed ready to snap under the pressure. Raven was always the strong one, the one who would never allow herself to succumb to something as mortal as death.

The beeping grew louder and more frantic, and Starfire let out a cry of distress. From the corner of his eye, Robin saw Beast Boy take her hand.

"Rob, get over here, I need your help," Cyborg called.

Robin nodded and rushed to Cyborg's side, glad that he could actually be of use. Cyborg called instructions to Robin over the wail of the equipment, and Robin responded to the commands with shaking hands. It was so hard to regulate levels and look at charts when he could see that reddened body lying so erect on the table. His gag reflex was on overload, and it took all of his willpower to control it. She was so still, and her heart rate was escalating…no, he wouldn't dwell on it. He needed to take action.

The titans' heads shot up when they heard a strangled gasp.

Robin rushed to Raven's side. Her wide eyes had just fluttered open, though not without difficulty. The moan that the girl issued was heart-wrenching, and Robin grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze. Her eyes suddenly focused on him, and he could swear that she gave the smallest hint of a smile, as if seeing him gave her hope.

"Robin," her smile twisted into a grimace, "It hurts." Her teeth were gritted, and his grip on her hand increased. She gave a feeble squeeze in response.

"It'll all be over soon, Raven, I-," he cut himself off. He wouldn't give her another promise that he couldn't keep. Her face tightened in a suppressed scream, and Robin looked over to Cyborg with desperation.

"I'm trying man, I'm trying."

Raven's grip tightened, then it started to fade.

"No, no, Raven, hang in there. We've got you, just hold on!" The desperation in his voice made the others feel like they were trespassing on a private moment. They watched her gulp in air, as her face tightened and the hand not in Robin's clenched itself tightly around the bedsheets.

Then, in a sudden movement, her tensed body fell completely limp. Robin begrudgingly took his hand from hers and stood. It seemed that Cyborg's quick dose of morphine had taken effect, and Robin was glad that she could no longer feel the pain.

"Cy, how is she?" The leader's voice sounded weary, and the titans couldn't help but remember how young their leader truly was. And how human, susceptible to all the pains of human grief.

"It looks like her vitals are coming back up to normal. We can all take a breath for now, she's definitely improving."

There was a general breath of relief.

"Cy, um, could you check if…?" Robin trailed off, unwilling to speak the words. Instead he shot a concerned look at the prone girl, knowing that his friend understood the unfinished question.

The metal teen gave a small nod, his eyes suddenly weighted by something. He bent over the girl. Robin closed his eyes and breathed evenly. He couldn't watch this. Long moments passed in silence disturbed only by the smallest rustles of Cyborg at work.

Finally, Robin opened his eyes, exhaling slowly.

"Cyborg?" The question was tentative, so many emotions portrayed in the single word.

"I'm sorry. I guess we were just unlucky." The teen hung his head.

Robin let out an animalistic grunt and sent a kick into the wall. All of the titans' heads shot up in surprise. "That bastard," Robin growled, "That motherfucking bastard. Ughhhhh!" A fist pounded into the wall. And suddenly, he was still, the once fisted hand flat against the wall, and everyone knew what was happening beneath his mask.

"Cyborg?" Beast Boy asked quietly. Robin was crying, they all knew it, though they could only hear the occasional choked sob come from him. "What happened?"

"He got to her, Beast Boy. We were too late."

The boy hung his head, eyes wet. Starfire did the same beside him, but her crying was much more pronounced than either of the two boys. Her sobs were mixing with watery hiccups. Cyborg wasn't crying, but he felt that one of the titans needed to be strong at the moment. On the inside, however, he was heartbroken. He cast a glance at the sleeping girl. _She is alive. She is alive. She is alive._ He repeated that in his head like a mantra, knowing that it was true. The only question was whether she would pull through after all of this.

Slade had raped her. That was a fact, a terrible, terrible fact.

But they had finally caught him. That was a good fact, a very good fact.

And Raven was going to live. That was a beautiful, beautiful fact.

**A/N- I started this so long ago but with all the craziness I never finished. Sorry about that! Probably only one more chapter, and maybe an epilogue after that. Thanks for sticking it out with my first fanfiction!**

**Until next time, **

_Ignite The Airwaves_


	14. Closure

**A/N- Back! *dodges various projectiles* Hah, school musical made me a bit busy. Oops. Well, at least I'm here now. General review thanks to **DarkAngel620, Marro, Tortor, RobRae4Ever!, shewhowillnotbenamed, Regina lunaris, Tsuki- hime Neko, **and** yankeesgeek2.0**. As usual, it's great to see one or two new reviewers this late in the game. **

**Individual review answers: **

buddybuddy96- **Not sure, but I felt like saying Robin was speaking Hebrew was a cool little character development. Doubt that it's true though, bit of an improvisation on my part. **

morphious444- **I'll be honest that I'm not quite sure how Cyborg could have screened her for rape. Therefore, I left it ambiguous and hoped no one would notice. But you did. Heh. Good for you. **

Existentialism

Chapter 14: Closure

The Teen Titans were beginning to understand what it really felt like to be grateful; to understand how good their lives were, and how easily such good things could be taken away. In the past four days they had watched their friend's breathing even, had seen her rise from her bed on shaky legs, and finally walk quite solidly down the hall. Cyborg had gotten all of the red out of the hospital sheets. Everything felt cleaner. But Robin and Raven, although neither knew so of the other, were both still dwelling on the past.

Raven was in the control room, watching the wall in a listless silence. Her book was too far down from her eyes, so Robin knew that in no way was she reading. He too, had been gazing in a dead stare, but at her, completely neglecting the plate of food before him in the process. It had already long gone cold when he tore his eyes away from the girl and rose from his seat. He approached her.

"Raven, is everything alright?" She jumped, startled, and then averted her eyes in embarrassment, a red tinge in her cheeks.

"Um, yeah, Robin, fine. Why do you ask?"

He took a seat next to her on the couch, "You sure don't seem fine." She fidgeted uncomfortably next to him, just the tiniest bit. But of course he noticed.

"You seem jumpy," he noted. She was about to issue a standard, stiff response, but something deep in her made her decide not to.

"I'm still a bit in shock," she murmured, and he leaned in so he could actually hear the words.

"There's no need to be, Raven. It's all over." He could tell that she felt the lie. It tasted bitter on his tongue, and he watched as she breathed slowly for a long moment before responding.

"You don't really feel that way, and neither do I."

He didn't have to nod. She knew that he agreed. In a quick moment, Robin took Raven's hand, an odd frown creased on his face. Raven couldn't quite understand his expression, and that made her feel concerned. His hand was warm in hers, but she was too surprised to pull away.

"Come on. I think that there's something we need to do." He pulled her along to his motorcycle, and they departed together from the tower in silence. Even with the wind whipping by them and with her arms awkwardly looped around Robin's waist, Raven could still not determine his intention, and the feeling was bothersome. She had always read him so well.

The dread settled on her when they reached the Jump City Penitentiary, because now she understood. When she rose from the bike, her legs were trembling. To repress the action, she clenched her fists tight and gulped hard, but she could tell that it didn't help. She felt Robin take her hand again, and she didn't even object. It helped her nerves a bit, though she would never admit it.

"This is something we both need to do," he said, "And I don't think either of us can sleep tonight until we do it." She nodded her head once, and he felt her palm going sweaty in his. He gave her hand a squeeze, and they started towards the doors.

The guards parted as they passed, obviously respecting the heroes. In the back of her mind, Raven thought that that was nice for a change. They didn't seem to notice that they were holding hands. She liked it better that way.

It was getting darker, and they were seeing fewer and fewer guards. Raven's stomach was dropping hard and fast and an animal scream was blowing up tight in her throat. Robin was gripping her hand harder now, as if helping her to keep it down. A metal door was swung open, and then she saw the face. Those slate eyes, the darkened hair. And she heard his ever-present laugh. The very noise in the silent room made her spine spark. He was restrained heavily, but that meant nothing to her. She could feel a tidal wave of emotions now, crushing her under their ferocious strength, and she couldn't breathe. But she couldn't collapse. Not there. She wouldn't give that man the goddamned satisfaction.

"Raven, you look well." Beside her, Robin bristled.

"Don't you dare speak to her!" he shot out. Slade merely raised an eyebrow and observed the intertwined hands.

"My, my, seems we've found a spark of romance. Always need someone around to fuck, hmm, Raven?" His voice was cool, and much too calm. Robin, however, was another story. He rushed forward and picked the man off of the ground by his collar, slamming him into the wall.

"Don't you dare. Think about it, Slade. We won. You just can't stand it, can you?"

Slade laughed, "My dear boy, look at the lovely woman beside you. I can hardly say that you won." Robin pressed Slade up against the wall harder, but the man showed no signs of pain. That only angered Robin further.

Throughout this dispersal of dialogue, Raven had been fighting a deep swell in her stomach. He was looking at her so intently, almost as if he could still see her as she lied unclothed beneath him…no, that thought was unacceptable. She felt as if the scars open her body were twisting and reopening and spelling out sickly red words. It was only as Robin spoke that the black power sprung to her fingertips, and then, oddly enough, Raven smiled. It was a cruel smile, yes, but a smile nonetheless.

"Leave him, Robin. Let him go."

"Raven?" Robin looked up in surprise, "But Slade, he was the one who-,"

She rose up a hand in interruption, "I know what he did." She leaned close to the man. "Slade Wilson," she whispered, "And, yes, I do know your name- You will be sorry for what you did. But I'm not going to make you sorry myself. In fact, no one on my entire team will do so." She continued, obviously pleased with his confusion. "Just take a minute and think about your situation. You've marked me, but I can move on. You, however, are not being convicted only of rape, but also fifteen counts of first degree manslaughter, five counts of second degree manslaughter, as well as multiple counts of fraud. Shall I go on? There's much more, as I'm sure you know."

The villain seemed dumbfounded, and without his mask his face seemed quite small. Robin noticed that Raven's face seemed drawn, and her fists were still tight, but he thought nothing of it.

"I can move on from this. I will forget all about you, until I cease to care and you cease to exist. But Slade, whether you're stuck in this box or convicted to Death Row, I know that your life won't go on. And that makes me satisfied enough."

With that, the girl strode from the room, Robin quickly following behind her. He was impressed by the way that she had handled things. It was very mature, and very confident.

However, those perceptions were shattered when he walked outside. Raven sat hunched on the bench across the street, head in hands. He ran across the road and sat by her side. Gingerly, he pulled her hands from her face. Her eyes were reddened.

"I'm sorry, Robin," she immediately said, voice thick with tears, "I tried so hard to make my words true, but I don't think that I can do it. I said that in a fit of rage, but I don't really care what happens to Slade, as long as he gets put away forever. I'm just afraid that I can't move on. When I saw him sitting there, Robin, I thought I was going to explode. It all hurt, it hurt so much." The boy wonder gently wiped at the corner of Raven's eyes with his finger, and she blinked in surprise.

"Raven, you really need to stop apologizing." And then he hooked his hands under her chin, the pads of fingers stroking her cheeks ever so lightly. Raven felt a fluttering in her chest. Robin leaned in, and finally captured Raven's lips with his own. It was a passionate kiss, but contained and sweet.

As they broke apart, Raven seemed amazed. But then she muttered, "Robin, I don't know, I'm worried, he hurt me so badly, if you get close to me I…," she stopped and really looked at him, and then at the prison they had just left behind. This was Robin. He had searched for her, loved her. He would never do anything she wouldn't ordain. "Okay." She issued a rare smile. "But for now, very slowly. Let's just take it one step at a time."

_**THE END**_

**A/N- Oh. My. God. It's over. More time to work on my other fictions, I suppose. There may be a sequel to this, but I highly, highly doubt it, so don't get your hopes up. Thanks to all of my lovely reviewers for helping me get this far. **

**This story began: August 2, 2009**

**This story ended: March 8, 2010**

**My speed= horrible, but my success= high. Thanks to everyone! Check out my other fictions, all being updated besides Predator (which I may continue soon anyway) and the oneshots. **

**Until next time,  
**_Ignite The Airwaves_


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